HERE I AM!!

I’m having fun already and I don’t even know what I’m doing!!  I’m a 45 year old mother of 2 (19 & 22) and wife to Tim for 25 years.  I have been described as having a gentle, quiet spirit, but that doesn’t mean I don’t have a lot to say.  What it really means is if I’m in a group setting, I will not interrupt you.  I wait quietly for someone to take a breath so that I can contribute to the conversation.  Do you know what I’ve learned?  Sometimes we love the sound of our own voice don’t we?  Sometimes that person we see as “quiet” is really just a listener.  An observer.  I try, most of the time, to think before I speak.  I think that’s why I love to write.

If I was beginning this blog 20 years ago it would look very different than what it is today.  I may be venting about morning sickness while working full time.  Navigating the terrible 2’s while pregnant.  Desperately needing a date night with my husband, but who can afford a sitter AND dinner, right?  If I were writing this 6 or 7 years ago…my oh my.  I would be talking about raising teenagers in a world that is saturated with social media, secret things in cell phones, and loving (without killing) a very strong willed teenager and a gentle, always smiling, younger child.  We helped one child navigate their decision of what to do with their life and are in the throes of it with another.

I do not have all of the answers to marriage or raising children.  I’ve made mistakes in both.  I don’t know the secret to being the “best friend ever” to anyone.  But I know the One who does.  And I know with every fiber of my being, that we were all created for relationship.  If I can drive just one point home in this first post, it’s that.  As I look back over my adult life (so far) most of the milestones that come to mind involved other people.  Friends have come and gone.  Some by chance, some on purpose.  God has used people to teach me about Him, about mothering, about being a wife.  He has used people to teach me about humility, serving others, blessing others and leaning on people other than myself.  Through it all, I’ve grown closer to Him.  That is what our relationships are for, to draw us closer to Him.  Even the failed ones.

I know that God honors relationships that are authentic.  Genuine.  Raw.  If my life really belongs to Him, then He gets all of it.  The good, the bad and the ugly.  He wants to use ALL of me to draw myself and others to Him.

I’m learning to speak up more. I’m learning to not worry if someone will agree with my opinion.  I’m learning to stop filtering what I say through the sieve of judgment and fear.  It’s a horrible trap that can suck the life out of you.

This place…this blog…will come from my heart.  I  hope we can connect on here.  Lock arms.  Push through. Pray for one another.  Celebrate together.  Share wisdom.  Be real.  Encourage one another in this thing called life.

Advertisements

Leave a Reply

Fill in your details below or click an icon to log in:

WordPress.com Logo

You are commenting using your WordPress.com account. Log Out / Change )

Twitter picture

You are commenting using your Twitter account. Log Out / Change )

Facebook photo

You are commenting using your Facebook account. Log Out / Change )

Google+ photo

You are commenting using your Google+ account. Log Out / Change )

Connecting to %s